School officials discuss demographic trends

At a recent meeting of the school committee, town officials announced the results of a six-month demographic study of Milton’s population conducted by top university academics and government demographers.

The officials stated the principal take-away of the study being that, by 2023, nearly 70% of Miltonians will be five year olds.

In light of these findings, the officials recommended adding two million square feet of new school space, retrofitting town-owned bathrooms with little toilets, an extensive afternoon nap program and an unlimited Netflix account.

In a related matter, the Milton Playground Planners announced a $39 million capital campaign.